


bottled up teardrops

by animalcrossings



Category: Love Victor
Genre: Best Friends to Lovers, Confession, M/M, bi felix, felix learn to talk abt ur feelings, velix - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-18
Updated: 2020-06-18
Packaged: 2021-03-04 00:54:11
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,610
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24784957
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/animalcrossings/pseuds/animalcrossings
Summary: felix is scared of being vulnerable. he promised himself he’d never cry in front of anyone again. victor is his best friend, and they’ve always got eachothers back. nothing could ever change that right?aka i suck at writing summaries and i’m a sucker for the best friends to lovers trope <3
Relationships: Velix, Victor Salazar/Felix Weston
Comments: 4
Kudos: 175





	bottled up teardrops

**Author's Note:**

> velix velix velix because i miss them already  
> i can’t decide if i like this or not & it kinda ended up a lot longer than i planned on but i hope u guys like it !!

felix had made a promise to himself that he’d never let anyone else see him cry. it had all begun one day in elementary school when someone had teased him about his mom, and when he burst into tears, they only teased him more. he decided that day onward he would keep his tears locked up, so nobody could make fun of him again. 

unfortunately, he continued to be made fun of, made into andrew’s punching bag. the word lone stone was practically etched into his forehead; it was something he couldn’t shake. so, he learned to live with it, no matter how much he disliked it. he tried not to show anyone how much it actually bothered him. 

and then he met victor. victor, who didn’t know anything about who felix used to be. he’d never felt more strangely connected to anyone in his life. and he vowed he wouldn’t screw friendship with victor up. 

being friends with victor sure had its ups and downs. for one, the boy was like a drama magnet. felix didn’t mind tagging along though. after all, victor was his new best friend, and felix had to support him. 

and through victor, who started dating mia, felix got to know lake. i mean sure, he already knew everything about lake: her birthday, her shoe size, what time she usually posts on instagram. that’s just the basic level not-too-stalkerish social media searching you do when you have a crush on someone. but now felix /really/ got to know her. 

things were great. he got to hook up with his long time crush, what more could he want? sure, there were bumps along the way, but eventually they smoothed it out. he told lake he wanted more than just kissing in the janitors closet during passing period, and she decided she didn’t care about what other people thought about them. 

he had a great relationship with a beautiful girl who he’d been crushing on for forever. so why did it feel like an elephant was sitting on his chest every time he looked at victor?

he watched as victor and benji got together, and he was so happy for them. after all, victor is his best friend. why wouldn’t he be overjoyed for them?

felix found himself growing increasingly more upset. he didn’t know why, but willed himself not to cry. and when lake broke up with him in front of all their friends, when he watched lake and mia get together, when benji asked victor to the school dance, he willed himself not to cry. because his friends were happy. that’s what mattered. 

one morning he snapped. he couldn’t do it anymore. he heard his alarm clock go off, but didn’t get up. victors voice crackled over the walkie talkie. “felix? are you there? over.” felix closed his eyes and let out a deep sigh. “felix. come in. we’re gonna be late for school. over.” felix still made no attempt to reply. he just covered his face with his hands. he didn’t think he could manage school anyways. 

felix heard faint footsteps. they grew louder and louder until there was a knock at his door. he didn’t budge. he was too tired of everything to care who it was. “felix?” victor’s soft voice murmured from the other side of the door. “are you alright?”

the door creaked open slowly. victor walked carefully over to felix’s bed and sat down at the foot of it. complete silence. “buddy... say something please.” victors tone sounded concerned. 

felix removed his hands from his face and turned over on his side, wrapping his arms around his pillow. “felix please. say something. tell me what’s wrong.” victor pleaded, eyebrows furrowed in confusion as he stared at his friend. 

felix opened his mouth to speak and willed his voice not to tremble. “i’ll be fine, victor. go to school.” 

“felix-“

“i feel sick, but i’ll be fine. you’d better go or you’re gonna be late.” felix says, thanking the heavens his voice didn’t waver once. he could feel victor’s gaze on his back and he held his breath, praying he’d leave. 

“okay. text me if you need anything.” victor stood up and left the room, closing the door behind him. felix exhaled once he knew victor was fully gone. but he didn’t cry. 

he showed up at school the next day his normal cheery self. he brushed off the concerned looks his friends gave him. “i’m fine guys i swear. my head was hurting really bad but i’m okay now.” he didn’t see the glance mia and victor shared, or the way lake frowned at him. instead, he changed the topic, blabbering on about whatever came to mind. 

and soon, like every other minor event in life, felix’s “sick day” was forgotten. just like that, their friend group was back to their normal, everyday drama. and felix was back to being everybody’s favorite, happy-go-lucky, never sad guy — right?

-

he was wallowing over something or other in his room when the walkie talkie on his bedside made a noise. he picked it up and held it to his mouth. “victor? hello? over.”

the response was a half muffled, strangled sob. “i need you.”

within five seconds felix had jumped up and out the door, his own sadness forgotten. in an instant he was in victors bedroom. his best friend was curled up in a ball on his bed, tears streaming down his face. felix sat down on the bed beside him, unsure of how to best help victor. 

he placed a hand gingerly on victor’s shoulder. “vic? are you... okay?” he murmured quietly. “we broke up.” came the reply. a million thoughts rushed through felix’s head. why did they break up? who dumped who? was it because they like someone else? does victor like someone else? he pushed the thoughts away. ‘i have to be here for victor.’

“i’m so sorry.” felix whispered, tightening his grip on victor’s shoulder to comfort him. he was silent, giving victor the space to say what he wanted. “i... i did it. he... he wouldn’t....” victor could barely speak between sobs. “he wouldn’t stop talking about d-derek and i had to remind him that i-i’m not... derek a-and it got so tiring.” 

felix didn’t know what compelled him to, but he put his hand on victor’s cheek and turned the other boys head to face him. “whatever reason it happened for is valid.” he said slowly, eyes meeting victor’s red, puffy ones. “i’m so sorry you have to go through this, but i’m here for you.” he used his thumb to wipe away a tear that rolled down victor’s cheek. 

they sat like that, facing one another for one moment too long before victor sniffed and then smiled, wrapping his arms around felix for a hug. felix’s breath hitched in his throat as he accepted victor’s embrace. him and victor had hugged before. so why did this feel different? 

part of him wanted to hold onto victor forever. the other part urged him to leave now. he ignored both and held on until victor eventually pulled away, rubbing his eyes with his sleeve. “thank you, felix.” he said, smiling softly. 

“of course, victor. i’ve always got your back.” felix replied, trying desperately to ignore the butterflies in his stomach. they were the same butterflies he used to feel when he thought about lake. unfortunately, he did not have time to unpack what that meant. right now, his main focus was cheering up victor. and that’s what he did. the two had a movie night where the laughed over cheesy old romance movies and stuffed their faces with popcorn until they fell asleep. 

-

weeks went by felix could not get the hug out of his head. he craved to hold victor again, to feel those feelings again, but he didn’t know why. so, as every person naturally does, he had a conversation with himself. sitting on the floor, slumped up against a locker after school, he began to think. ‘victor’s my best friend, that must be why.’ he reasoned, but another voice inside of him pressed further. ‘or maybe you like victor.’ he rolled his eyes. ‘of course i like victor he’s my friend.’ 

‘no, i think you /like/ victor.’ his eyes widened and he shook his head as though to shake the idea away. ‘no. i don’t. i can’t.’ he buried his head in his hands and audibly sighed. 

“dude... you okay?”

the last person felix expected to be checking up on him was andrew, but when he looked up, sure enough, that’s who was standing in front of him. “yeah yeah, i’m.. im fine.” felix sighed, unable to hide his troubled tone. 

andrew looked down at him in doubt, then offered out a hand to help felix up. reluctantly, felix grabbed on and hoisted himself up. 

“look man, i don’t know what’s going on with you, but whatever it is i think you gotta talk it out. unless you wanna play basketball, cause that’s what i usually do to get my feelings out.” he smirked at felix. “but you don’t seem like the basketball-type so what’s going on?” 

felix swallowed. “i can’t tell you. i-i’m sorry i-“

andrew cut him off. “it’s okay, i get it. i haven’t always been the nicest to you in the past. i think you should go talk to someone you’re closer with. someone like victor.”

felix swallowed again. ‘how am i supposed to talk to victor when he’s the problem?’ he plastered on a fake smile and nodded. “yeah, i’ll do that. thanks andrew.” he said. andrew smiled in return and patted him on the back. as he walked away, felix thought to himself ‘im definitely not gonna do that.’

unfortunately for felix, it seemed like the whole world was against him. when he tried to return home, he found pilar waiting outside his apartment door. “what did you do to my brother?” she demanded. 

felix’s face scrunched in confusion. “what do you mean what did i do?” 

pilar tilted her head but her angry expression didn’t change. “he said you’ve been ignoring him, what happened.”

“i haven’t been ignoring him!” felix scoffed. 

“felix you usually come over to our house at least twice a day. you haven’t been over regularly in at least a month.” pilar crossed her arms. 

felix thought about it and realized she was right. he hadn’t been over to the salazar’s in a while. but he didn’t mean to avoid them. 

pilar sighed and pinched the bridge of her nose, which brought felix’s attention back down to earth. “look, i don’t care what happened. he thinks you’re mad at him, so please just talk to him, okay?” 

after a moments pause, felix nodded. “yeah. okay.” 

-

felix spent the rest of the day thinking. he knew he needed to talk to victor about whatever the hell he was feeling soon, or else their whole friendship would be in jeopardy. it was friday night, and he ultimately decided to sleep on it. 

the next morning, he woke up and grabbed his walkie talkie. felix gulped nervously before pressing the button and speaking into it. “victor?” 

“i’m awake. what’s up?” felix could sense the weariness in victor’s voice. he frowned at the thought that something might be troubling his best friend to the point where he wasn’t sleeping. 

quietly, felix said, “i need you.” 

five minutes later, felix was waiting outside their apartment building, sitting in the same spot where victor had come out to him. he fiddled with his thumbs nervously. the sound of a door opening and footsteps behind him signaled victor’s arrival. 

the other boy sat down beside felix. “we need to talk.” victor said. “have you been avoiding me? cause whatever i did wrong i’m sorry. i don’t know what happened but you’re my best friend and i can’t keep living like this. if i hurt you or did something please tell me so i can fix it.” 

felix watched and listened intently as victor spoke, his facial expression neutral. he didn’t say anything. 

victor’s face skewed in anguish. “you’re not even going to say anything? i don’t understand what i did to deserve this. what happened to always having my back?” 

suddenly felix was transported back to that moment in victor’s bedroom. suddenly, somewhere deep down inside him, he decided to break his promise. and then he began to cry. tears dropped down his face like two little waterfalls gushing from his eyes. 

victor was shocked. he’d never seen felix like this. to be fair, nobody had ever seen felix like this. he’d been bottling up his tears for so long, and now that the floodgates opened there was no stopping them. 

felix turned his head away, as though embarrassed that victor was seeing him like this. and then he felt something touch his hand. he jolted around in shock, surprised to find victor’s hand resting lightly on top of his, squeezing it gently. 

felix closed his eyes and attempted to calm  
his breathing, and soon the whirlwind of tears began to ebb away. he took a few deep breaths and looked at victor, who was staring at him anxiously. 

“felix... please tell me the truth. what’s going on?” 

felix bit his lip and looked down at where the two of their hands rested on the brick wall. he looked back up at victor. “c-can you... turn around.” he said nervously. 

victor complied, shifting so that he was facing away from felix. feeling much less pressured, felix inhaled slowly and began to speak. 

“i’m sorry for avoiding you. i didn’t mean to, i guess it kinda happened subconsciously. i just... can’t stop thinking about things. about you. and maybe it’s wrong because you’re my best friend and i don’t wanna ruin our friendship but i can’t help myself from thinking that maybe i kinda sorta... like you.” felix exhales, letting all the thoughts he’s been compiling in his brain for a while spill out. “and so i guess i sorta pushed you away so i wouldn’t have to think about my feelings but obviously that didn’t work because here we are and-“ 

felix feels the grip around his hand tighten. he turns to look at victor, who is still respectfully facing the other direction. “wait... you like me?” 

felix tries to pull his hand away, thinking victor’s reaction is negative, but suddenly finds their fingers intertwined. “can i turn around please?” victor asks and felix responds with a meek yes. victor has tears in his eyes as he immediately lunges to bring felix into a hug and god damnit there go the butterflies again. he rests his chin on victor’s shoulder contently, breathing out shakily. 

“felix i think i...” victor trails off and felix lets go of him to get a better look at him. “i think i like you too.” a grin grows on felix’s face. “yeah?”

victor smiles bashfully. “i think... i think it’s always been you.” 

and then felix is crying again, and they hug again, and once the tears have all dried up, felix leans in for a kiss. sure, it’s no stereotypical picture-perfect movie type kiss, but it’s everything felix could have ever wanted. they stare lovingly at eachother, beaming. felix begins to shiver from the cold, so victor stands up. “my dearest boyfriend, will you accompany me inside for some hot cocoa?” he says in a cheesy accent that he definitely picked up from felix. 

boyfriend. my dearest boyfriend.  
those words will play over and over again in felix’s head for the rest of his life.


End file.
